The Book of Enforcement

Stephen Toulouse, Director of Policy and Enforcement for Xbox LIVE, discussing the development of the systems that Microsoft use to clean up their online service.



A full transcript can be found here.

Pants!

.. .. crying walking sleeping talking Hero doll.

I was just thinking, you see the wee guy up there, him wearing the skin tight Union Jack Speedo’s? He’s the generic Hero doll from my Fable 2 game. Now I’m guessing that UK gamers all have the same Union Jack Speedo wearing doll. What I’m interested to know is whether other countries have their own specific colours or flags on their Hero doll’s pants. They may not have seeing as Lionhead is British but I do wonder if Canadian Fable 2 players have Maple Leaf pants, USA players a pair of Stars and Stripes pants and if Italian Albion residents have Tricolore pants.

I’m also wondering if I have become obsessed with Albion...... maybe I need to get out more.

Anyway, as indulgent as it may be, I thought I’d put up some pics of the Hero dolls.

So here they are!




Before I go, I received an email from a fellow 360 gamer just a couple of days ago offering me a copy of the Hat, Headband, Moustache expression book in exchange for some of the dolls. Many thanks Bloodlustre. It was a pleasure gaming with you. He’s a lot nicer than his name suggests you know.

Union Jack pants or not you’ll be made welcome on the Gameov3r FORUM

Xbox Live Community at it’s best

Forget the trash talk, racism, shouting and swearing. Forget about the idiots that can sometimes try to stop other people having fun online. Most gamers just want to enjoy their games and enter into the community spirit. This is the Xbox Live Community at it’s best.

Fable 2 is the only game that I have ever played that has made me want to get all the achievements regardless of how difficult, devious or just bloody awkward they are to get. It’s a desire I have to squeeze every last drop fun out of Albion and my sign of respect to Lionhead for producing such a masterpiece.

Some of the achievements are straightforward and are part of the story. Others are unlocked for experimenting within Albion while collecting 50 Silver Keys and destroying 50 Gargoyles are quests all of their own. The difficult, devious and bloody awkward achievements I refer to here are of course The Doll Catcher and The Completionist.

The Doll Catcher requires you to have all the Hero Dolls in your inventory. The catch is that only one of the dolls, either Lucien, Hammer, Theresa, Reaver or Garth is available in each game so you have to trade online. It’s not the easiest task to obtain your doll as you must get second place, by scoring between 150 & 174 points, on the Westcliff Shooting Range. I did eventually win myself a Hero Doll, Hammer, and then went on to win 6 more hoping this would be enough to trade. I used the Red Dragon Pistol if anyone is interested in knowing which weapon I used. I found it's fast reload and accuracy helped a lot.

So, with the Hammer dolls in my possession I headed off to Bowerstone Market ready to trade. After a few hours of trying, despite my abundance of Hammer dolls, I didn’t manage to trade one single doll. Not because I couldn’t strike a deal but because I just couldn’t find anyone to trade with. Thinking that this wasn’t going to happen by chance I decided to check out the Xbox Forums. I’m glad I did! Using the Official Doll Trading thread on the Xbox forums I was able to offer my dolls for the ones I needed.

Even with my new plan I didn’t always manage to be online at the same time as anyone offering help but the fact people were offering trades, even those that already had the achievement, was great.

On Tuesday evening this week I officially became a Doll Catcher and .. erm .. despite feeling rather strange that I, a grown man, was talking to numerous other male gamers, most of whom sounded and spoke like mature gamers and who incidentally would probably fit in well on the Gameov3r FORUM, about swapping virtual toy dolls. I needed to shower when I had finished. One guy sent a message to me and I quote “easy fella, never thought I`d ever say this but you up for swapping some dolls?” Nail on the head I thought. He was a nice guy to. We had a brief chat, swapped our dolls and continued our respective cuddly toy related searches. There was none of this demanding large sums of gold or saying, “I want 5 of yours for one of mine” - he must have been a Taxman, or “give me all your gold and legendary weapons or you’re not having the doll!” ok I exaggerate, but the feeling I got before trying to collect all the dolls was that it would be hard work to prise them from their owners hands.

Actually it’s impossible to prise one from another Hero’s dead hands as you’re not allowed to kill another gamer’s Hero. Of course I wouldn’t kill another Hero even if I could. My hero is so good she even has a halo. Well she does now. She might have had horns, bad skin and evil green eyes at one time but none of us are perfect.

Anyway, I thought it was great that all the Fable 2 gamers I met online, yes all of them, were courteous, friendly and helpful. As mentioned at the top, I know there are still a minority that abuse Xbox Live and item trading in games. “I need hammer, lucien and theresa (someone just stiffed me for hammer, stole my doll)” is a recent quote from the Doll Catcher Thread on the Xbox forums.

But this is all about the good side and it has been very good indeed.

Many thanks to everyone I have traded with so far and also to those that tried to trade but couldn’t. In no particular order...

Penter2192 and for the co-op Companions achievement.
TalentFromGod
Lkf Remos
xCx PuP xJx
Sir Balin
Webizul
SJUVIP
TaMotha
Sent Seven
cuteyteena
alross13 who very kindly gave me the Back Flip Trick Book.

You’re all a credit to the Fable 2 community and to online gaming. I Belch, Victory Arm Pump, Dance, Fart and do the Sock Puppet thing in your honour.

If anyone reading this needs a Hammer doll just let me know and I'll try to help you out.

Now all I need is to trade something for the Hat, Headband, Moustache expression book and The Completionist Achievement will unlock. Help!? Help!!?? Gameov3r FORUM.

Error Code 85010

There are threads on the Gameov3r forum that goes something like this....

"XBox online = YAY!!!"

"Nintendo online = aaaaaaaarghhh!"

Wait! If you're a Nintendo fan sit back down. Put down that large, blunt and heavy object too and let me qualify those statements. The Gameov3r forum is far from biased. But if it is, just a little bit, it leans toward the Wii and the DS more than any other consoles. The “aaaaaaaarghhh!” is an honest “aaaaaaaarghhh!”

The Monday night online DS sessions have caused a headache or two for Gameov3r forumites. Disconnects, not being able to find any friends online and server errors all conspire to spoil the fun. The Wii hasn't faired much better with many gamers experiencing connection problems. Mario Strikers initially had connection issues, so much so that I stopped playing it along with most of Gameov3r. Geometry Wars: Galaxies has the poorest online capabilities I have seen so far. I actually have to go to the trouble of uploading my scores manually! Even then I can’t see my friends in a leaderboard. Medal of Honour Heroes 2 had online teething problems despite EA using their own servers. How simple it would be if I could just look up a friend in my friends list and click to join the game they’re playing. But no, it seems that online play is still included reluctantly, is not given the time or effort needed to make it easy and intuitive to use and more importantly work properly.

The UK doesn’t have Smash Bros Brawl yet but the word from USA based forum member the_corn is not good. Last I heard was he couldn’t get online. At all. He did say that Brawl was awesome nonetheless.

MK Wii is approaching the penultimate hairpin and will soon ripping past the UK release date. With my pessimistic socks pulled right up to my knees, I fully expect to be playing MK Wii on my own when it does.

Online issues have plagued Nintendo forever. From their “we’re not interested in online gaming” stance, to their current, seemingly, incompetent stance. Surely by now Nintendo realise the importance of online gaming and that they must start getting it right.

This is not the first time I’ve moaned about Nintendo online but these issues just won’t go away. Sounds to me like Gameov3r is struggling to make something go away too. I count 4 flushes already. Avoid trap 2 in the cellar on the Gameov3r FORUM

LiVEcence to Kill

There have been rumours that Bond, James Bond is coming to XBLA. Thankfully Domark and EA are nowhere to be seen. The rumours are of course about RARE's epoch-making first-person shooter, Goldeneye.

Unlike some game rumours this one carries a lot of weight in the same way that a wet paper bag doesn't. Those driving the rumour claim that the game is just a couple of months away from completion but sadly the last of the rumours, so far, states that the game has now been shelved because Microsoft and Nintendo could not come to an agreement over money. Someone somewhere is possibly overlooking the fact that Activision currently own the 007 licence and would also want a slice any remakes of Goldenpie.

Remarkably Microsoft have been drawn into commenting on the speculation adding further weight to the rumours. They said, "We don't comment on rumours and speculation." Bah! Thanks for sharing that Bill! More interesting though, and fanning the smoke that's hiding the flames, Microsoft then added that, "While the games community's response to this rumour is extremely flattering, we don't have anything to announce at this time." At this time!

The fact that Goldeneye is constantly discussed by gamers, on every forum I've ever visited, and has been the most requested game since Xbox Live launched must mean that Goldeneye will, eventually, arrive. It just has to be a question of when, not if.

There is something you can do to help. Oh yes! Pile the pressure onto those miserable corporate types that just want to spoil our fun by signing the Goldeneye re-release petition HERE. 22,196 gamers have already signed.

We want Goldeneye! Sign, sign, sign, SIGN!! Oh, and visit the Gameov3r FORUM too.

Remember these Bond "classics"? ... ... They might be amongst the Wii C64 re-releases soon!

Firm Support

See that guy in the middle? That's what I look like right now. I just got off the phone to Xbox LIVE support (not on my home line as that's still not working and they're 'experiencing an exceptionally high number of calls at the moment' and can't deal with it. Quite the opposite of me then!)

Anyway I now have 800 points credited back to me just in time for Rez HD next week if the rumours are true. It was a relatively painless experience albeit a lengthy one, they did however know what I was calling about and having given them almost every possible bit of information to get them to believe I am actually me, around 15 minutes later my refund was complete.

This has been my first experience of Xbox LIVE support and it was a good one. The guy was extremely polite even going so far as to ask if calling me by my first name was okay. I was on hold for quite a while as at the end of it he wasn't sure how to actually credit the points but top marks for manners. It's not often you hear when people have had a good experience as it's normally the bad ones that make you shout the loudest so there you go, if you did buy Undertow already give them a call.

Visit the GAMEOV3R Forum or just leave us a comment right here

Customer Satisfaction

Why is it that when dealing with companies today it's very rare you get a completely hassle free experience with helpful customer service? It seems even the simple act of buying a bag of crisps is fraught with problems these days as things now have to be scanned and typing in the number manually must only be considered as a last resort. I think the lady in the shop would still be frantically rubbing the packet over the glass panel in an effort to read it had I not fetched another bag to try.

The latest for me has been switching over my broadband and telephone, not to another company, just to a faster service with my phone line rental included in the price. I've been putting it off for a while thinking that if something is working DON'T mess with it! In the end though it seemed daft not to take up the offer seeing as it'll save a bit of money.

What got me thinking about this was all the Xbox LIVE problems over Christmas and unless I'm unlucky again, still continuing to this day. It seems the demand for the free XBLA game Undertow has tipped LIVE over the edge again with many people unable to download it at the moment. Of course the way my luck is I bought Undertow when it came out back in November. For people struggling you have until Sunday to get it for free. For people in my position I'm told that a call to Xbox LIVE support will result in a credit of 800 points. I fully intended to try this out today but having got through, the first thing I was asked for was my serial number. Silly me. No problem though, the lines are open until 10pm, I can phone when I get home from work. Which brings me nicely back round to the broadband and telephone upgrade.

I do indeed now have free line rental but with one catch... I can't actually make any phone calls. I guess I should be grateful really, at least my internet connection still seems to be worki.....................................................................