GO: First off then, what's your na..... oh I already said that didn't I.... my brain is somewhat sozzled after my recent bath. The heat and the witch hazel always does funny things to me. Tell us your name anyway will you.
StH: Derrrr....old fool.... heh heh.. I'm Sonic!
GO: Derrrr? Old? FOOL?? Listen here you little blue rat I've been in videogames since before you were a pixel in Sonic Team's eye. I'll wake Continue? and introduce you to him and his 5 sharp ends in a minute if you carry on! Then you'll be sorry! Right, next question, for the letter bomb, where do you curently live?
StH: I live on South Island man. It's so chilled out. I just kick back and relax sipping Mai Tai's all day.
GO: Mai Tai's? You poof! Get one of these down your scrawny blue neck and tell us what your first game was and if you have had any cameo roles?
StH: Well dude, [sip] bleeeuugh! what is this stuff? .... my first game, Sonic THE Hedgehog, named after me of course, rocked the world and left every gamer in a whirl man. I rocked so bad and I kicked Mario's fat ass! It's almost fatter than yours! Yea heh heh.... [sip] This stuff isn't tasting any better man. I got to drive a way cool car in Rad Mobile that was kinda fun and I played tennis like a pro in Sega Superstar Tennis. Real soon you'll see my track and field skills in my Olympic Games game too. Yea man, I rule!
GO: Your Olympic game? Isn't it called "Mario" and Sonic at the Olympic Games? That makes it more his than yours I think.
StH: I'm so pissed about that man. My agent promised me top billing and let me down. I handed him over to Robotnik on a platter. He's now a robot bat or something. He was a dweeb anyway.
GO: Tell us one thing you're the best at?
StH: Running really, really fast! Heh heh no one can catch me man! I'm the best at everything really dude but you asked for only one.
GO: Favourite job of all time?
StH: Oh man, rescuing all my cute furry pals from the clutches of the evil Robotnik back when I was 16Bit. Those were the days. I ruled 2D gaming dude!
GO: So really you're saying that all your 3D games are crap?
StH: Man they just didn't show my good side. Get it? 2D Get it!? Heh heh heh
GO: We get it. Do you have a good relationship with Shadow? The general view seems to be that he's a wafty cranker.
StH: I'm the original and best man and Shadow is just a pretender. Sega thought he might be the one to be their new mascot but I put paid to that when I put laxatives in his milk at the premier of his game. Heh heh... If he even comes close to stealing my crown I'll have Robotnik assimilate him too. He'd make a funny looking robot fish.
GO: Somewhere we'll never find you?
StH: In a Nintendo game of course! I hate Nintendo!
GO: Sonic and the Secret rings not "ring" any bells with you then? And have you not seen your latest DS adventures?
StH: Whhhaaa'? They told me those were GameGear and Dreamcast games! Man I'm calling my lawyer and I'm gonna take that exclusive contract offer from Bill. He promised me a part in Halo 4 you know?
GO: Really Sonic. Did you know that Sonic hedgehog homolog (SHH) is one of three proteins in the mammalian hedgehog family. It plays a key role in regulating vertebrate organogenesis, such as in the growth of digits on limbs and organisation of the brain?
StH: Errrr....wha'?
GO: I did.
GO: Sonic the Hedgehog thank you for visiting. Now finish the Caffreys and leave me. Oh, but before you do, just one more question before I take my tank out for a spin tonight, which country lanes do you cross on your way home?
Sonic the Hedgehog, videogame legend or cocky clueless upstart? Tell us here or on the Forum
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